Monday, September 28, 2009

You Probably Get Sweaty, You Should Bring an Extra Tee

Hello new world, here we go. Good morning everyone. I don't know why I'm so optimistic today. Blame it on the cereal. Seriously though, you should blame it on that. Thanks to my roommate, I am now a Crunch Berries fan.

I think that cereal has crack in it. I can taste it even when I haven't had it for a day or two. Does anyone know what happened to G-Unit? I feel like they just vanished. Oh well, who cares? It's G-Unit. What classic song did they make? Sorry, I'm feeling really random today. Also, if you wear tall tees with cartoon characters and/or dead rappers on them, you are horribly behind the fashion game. Yes, I used to wear tall tees but come on people, advance. I mean look at these:

Sigh. How absurd. I'm done thinking right now. Get active.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

We Don't Care

Yo. Who says "yo" anymore? I'll tell you who, people overseas who try so hard to be "American". "Oh no, it sounds like Jordan has a story." Why yes, I do have a good story. So, I just started getting into this Skype thing (jordanrunsit). Also, I think Skype is a joke. IChat is better. But alas, everyone uses it for some reason. Ok, lets get back to my story. So, on Skype, as many people know, there is a find feature. In other words, people can start chatting with you randomly without being on your contact list. So, I was on my computer the other day just taking it easy when a message pops up. It's some guy from Germany and he addresses me as such, "Yo, what's up homie?" Yes, all kinds of wrong. He continues on to list hip-hop legends such as 50 Cent, Akon, as well as Sean Paul. How silly. Sorry, that was my brain vomit for the day. I'll write something more substantial later.

Monday, September 21, 2009

Honey, I'm Nuts Like Cheerio's

I'm in psychology again, the source of all of my blogs. I have no idea why this happens. It just does. I was wondering, what happened to Samurai Jack?

That was such an underrated show. I wish it would come back and finish the story. I still am wondering if Jack ever goes back in time to change the past. Oh well.

I have a gripe about people. I mean everyone, including myself. I realized breakups are completely useless. Of course there the exceptions where there is any form of abuse occurring. But, my gripe is about people breaking up just to see other people. I don't understand. People can be "so in love" for years at a time and suddenly "need to see other people". It makes no sense. First of all, love is unconditional so no matter how good or how nice a person is, if someone is in love, they don't need anybody else. That's Biblical. Look it up. But, I'm going to pretend like seeing other people is feasible and go along with the logic so I can show everyone how dumb it is. By the way, this is not anything about anybody. The idea popped into my head a few months ago when I was eating Subway. Anyways, people will break up with their significant other for someone who "understands" them. Then they will leave that person for someone who is their "soulmate". What I'm trying to get at is that no matter what, the grass always looks greener on the other side. There's no one who's perfect. And, if there is someone who is perfect, they will get left for someone who is "more complex". In other words, humans as a whole get on everybody's nerves. It doesn't matter who that person is, they will always get on that person's nerves. Therefore I have a revolutionary theory-the people who find "true love" did not just find the right person for them. They simply found the person who annoys them the least. That sounds very cynical, but think about it. It's so true. Now, let me see you get your hands up.

Friday, September 18, 2009

I Want You to Hold Me, Console Me

Thank God it's Friday. What a stupid phrase. Why can't we thank God for Saturday or Sunday or any of the other days? Why not T.G.I.M.N.F. which means thank God it's monday night football? These are all things I thank God for. Anyways, I'm convinced that Kanye West is the coolest, most original guy on the planet. Oh no. I started some controversy. But seriously, a lot of the stuff Kanye says, though unpolished, is what a lot of people are thinking inside their mind. Plus, you cannot doubt his musical ingenuity.

Speaking of geniuses, I want to spotlight a pioneer that many have seen, but do not even know. Guillermo del Toro is the creative genius that designed creatures for various films. If there's a film that has creative monsters or creatures, he created it. However, he is best known in America for being the creator of the "Hellboy" film franchise. However, his best work was his Spanish film, "Pan's Labyrinth"

This film has to be one of the most visually stunning film's in film history. However, it is also a complete film. The story is very intriguing. The music is epic and is very appropriate for the film. And, the characters are very realistically designed and even though they are supposed to be strange and frightening, they are also beautiful in the most absurd way. Exactly, it's a contradiction. Just watch it. That's all I can say. Ok, I'll write more later. Judo chop!!

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Every Time I Try to Leave

Something keeps pulling me back. I’m talking about the blog game of course. I was wondering, when people sheepishly say sorry, why do they throw their hands up and get the most absurd look on their face? It’s so uncanny to me. I really do not understand at all the thinking behind it. And then, the person says something like, “Well soooooooorry. I’m not touching it.” How stupid. You know what’s funny about that? I do it all the time.
You want to know someone who is very underrated as an artist? I’ll tell you who-Tim Burton. Que? Yes, I said Tim Burton. He is a filmmaking genius. He is one of the few artists who is able to have mainstream success, yet retain his artistic integrity. He’s also had the longevity to touch more than one generation. His first major hit, "Pee-wee's Big Adventure", was made before I was even born. After looking up his movie list, most of the classic movies of the 90's as well as his newer movies have all received critical acclaim. What he will most be remembered for was a little movie he did called "The Nightmare Before Christmas":

This movie alone cements Tim Burton's legacy, but he has made literally 20 movies. All of them are well known. I didn't even know he made some of the movies he did. Honestly, people should look it up. It's rare one gets to exhibit an artistic legend firsthand while he is is still alive. That just popped up in my head. Why am I blogging while doing laundry? Who cares? Get out of my business.

Hey, Hi, How You Doin'?

Well, guess what? Just kidding, don't guess. I don't have anything to say to you. I'm sitting in my psychology class next to my boy from Detroit, home of the Lions.... yes that good team that's going to the Super Bowl and winning it all. Anyways, on the way to class we were talking about fighting. Yes, that's all we talk about. But anyways, we were talking about big people and people who could fight. I came from the viewpoint that there were a lot of people who looked big to the eye, but had no strength and were just wastes of space. You know who can fight besides Floyd Mayweather Jr.? Manny Pacquiao:

Yea, he's that good. But, guess what? He only weighs around 140. But for his size, he has to register his hands as lethal weapons. Yes I said LETHAL WEAPONS. I'm 225 lbs. Manny Pacquiao can still knock me out. Keep that in mind next time you think of fighting someone. They might be a world class boxer that will kill you. Sorry, I went overboard. Oh and for the record, Kimbo Slice is still the truth. He's been training for a little bit over a year. Cut him some slack. I mean look at him:

He also, will kill you. Or knock your dread off. Ok, I'm done for this one. And, I'm so high I thought I saw a spaceship. Just playing. I don't smoke.

Where Are We Going?

Hey. Notice that this is the first time I started a blog just saying hi. But anyways, I have an amazing story. So, I met this shorty the other day. I got her number, called her up like, "What you doing?" She said, "Nothing." I said, "What's good?" She said, "Not much." I said, "Guess what?" She said, "What's up?" I said, "I think we should hook up." She said, "Ugh" I said, "What?" She said, "But..." I said, "But? Why you stuck?" Ok I'm done. If anyone doesn't know, I just told you a story that is part of a song. How dumb of me. Sorry, I wanted to see what it would look like written out. Oh man, you guys should do this. Say lyrics like you're having a conversation. Some stuff sounds deeper or funnier that way. I don't know why I do these things. I'm strange.

Does anybody read anymore? I'm finding that I can't talk to people about books because they don't read or even look up stuff anymore. They're very visually cultured, yet they can't read a sentence or spell for anything. I read this book my freshman year and I think everyone should read it. It's called "Native Son" by Richard Wright.

This book happens to be one of the most intense books I've ever read in my whole entire career of living. Yes, living my life is a career. Anyways, I recommend it for everyone because it does a good job of portraying life through both the eyes of white America as well as minorities. It's a perfect balance. Get knowledge.

Today is a good day. I'm working my way back to where I need to be. The song of the day has to be "Sweetest Love" by Robin Thicke. He knows how to get that good mood going. I need to stop. How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? I have the answer. Who freaking cares?

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Shake It, Don't Break It

Once again, I'm in my room, laying on my bed and thinking about random thoughts. Does anybody remember the movie Kazaam?

Yes! Shaq was a genie at one point. But seriously, Shaq can do anything. I mean, he dunks on people on a daily basis. He competes in other sports. He's a sheriff. But, before any of those things, he was a genie...that could rap!! Come on, if that does not say renaissance man, I don't know what does.

Anyways, I got a profound thought the other day. Sometimes, we get too caught up trying to get ahead that we sometimes burn ourselves out. I found from time to time, we need to go back to basics. I mean complete and utter basics. It seems hard at first because we are regressing, but at the end of the day, we catch up and even surpass what we could have done if we kept going the complex way. If they say why, tell them that it's human nature.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Leave a Mark That Can't Erase Neither Space or Time

Ok, on my end it is raining cats and dogs outside. I'm kind of gloomy. By the way, who came up with that term "raining cats and dogs"? I'm going to take this to the max, what if it was actually raining cats and dogs? Ok, anybody who has a Michael Vick joke can stop now. They're all old. Be easy. If it was raining cats and dogs, what would we do? Would that even be safe? Could I go to school? For dogs that wanted a mate, would it be the equivalent of "It's Raining Men" coming to life? Would the sky be the unknown perpetrator that had let the dogs out under our very noses?

Sorry. That was extremely random. I'm looking outside and now that it's raining solidly for the first time this year, I'm going to get really introspective on this post. For anyone who didn't know, I'm writing a book on my life and it won't be finished until I hit a significant milestone in my adult life. Anyways, as I've been going through my life, I honestly see my life as a movie, complete with soundtrack. It's weird, but hey, I'm a weird guy. So obviously, if my life were to be made into an actual movie, this stage of my life would obviously be a major chapter, so to speak, in my movie. I'm starting a new phase of my life, I'm a freshman, I'm meeting new people, and my whole environment and routine is changing. I can't help but think that this part of my life would be the equivalent to the part in the middle of the movie where the person goes through their greatest hardship, only to prevail in the end. What if this part is my hardship?

To be honest, this year has not been my year. Of course it's been happy, but for the most part, it has been rough. I've still been working towards my accomplishments and gotten closer to my dreams. However, it's been going not only slower than I thought, but also it hasn't been to the degree I wanted it to be. I'm not afraid to say I've experienced my greatest heartbreaks this year both with my dreams and with those words that start with a "G". I'm also at that crossroads where decisions I make or don't make will determine not just that one situation, but also my future. Oh boy, that was heavy stuff right? Sorry. But seriously, at the same time I also realize that during those movies and in reality, when those hard times come, the person who gets what they want in the end works at it. I mean, they train harder, study harder, think harder. Heck, they even love harder. I know Jay-Z's album just came out, but on his song "Young Forever", before he says this line that is so profound, "May the best of your todays be the worst of your tomorrows." Sad music is playing in the background so obviously complete idiots would even say, "oh man, that's so deep." But, why is it deep?

I've been thinking about that line all day today and I realized something. When we're striving towards our dreams, the road gets really rough. I mean, it gets to a point where you wonder why God even bothered creating you because you feel so disconnected from everything in your life and everything you've been trying to do. Blog community, I'm not gonna try to lie. I feel this way. I feel so out of sync with everything in my life, that when I get up all the harsh realities punch me in the face. I know a lot of people out there feel this way too. Instead of trying to gain sympathy for your hardships and hoping something will magically come, it's not going to happen. People always talk about working hard to get what they want, but most people are only in love with the idea. When the first hardship comes, 90% of people just give up or settle for less. Don't do that! Even in the movies, when someone hits bottom, they scrape and scratch their way back to the top. I decided I'm going to do that. I won't ask for sympathy. I'm going to ask God for help and I'm going to work harder than anyone on this planet to get to where I need to be. Some things you can't force. I'm learning that now. Some things, only God and time can help. For those things, please believe I'm praying like my life depends on it. Hopefully it works out. Ok, got that out of the system. We're going to have some fun next time. Sorry for bothering people with this post. Hopefully, it helped at least one person.

No I'm Not a Jonas. Brother, I'm a Grownup

Happy Friday! Why is it happy? Well, the Blueprint 3 is OFFICIALLY out.

I don't deal with bootleg when it comes to the greats. Show some respect. My goodness. But anyways, I have to do a shout out/advertisement. Purple Spazz Clothing is back in it. If you're in D.C. all you have to do is find me. Oh so easy. On the California end, just find it. Yes I'm being difficult. Sorry Charlie.

So, I have a funny story for everyone. Story time? Yes, it is story time. How nice of me, right? Right. Anyways, two nights ago was rough for me. I was up until 5 in the morning thinking about my life and worrying about the future. Notice the dramatic prelude I just gave you before I even started my story. But, anyways, I woke up at 6 yesterday. Yes, do some math. I got an hour of sleep. When I woke up, I went running as part of my training.  Then, I did all of my classes. Right after that I had an intense lifting session. Following that, I got a shower and got ready for a seminar for my business school. You can already tell where this is going. It was a mandatory seminar and everyone in the business school had to attend. So there were about 100 people in the first session. I was paying attention at first. I was really into it. Then the spirit of sleep possessed my body. I was fighting it really well, but then his cousin, the spirit of head bobbing paid a visit. Now I'm fighting two ghosts as I try to stay awake and pay attention. The spirit of sleep got the last laugh. One second, I think I'm blinking off sleep. The next thing I know, I'm hearing my name called repeatedly, and when I open my eyes, I see every head in the auditorium turned around staring at me and the presenter is putting me on blast. But, I take it like a champ. She tried to ask me a question to get me caught up. I answered it. Yes, I got it like that and that lady can kick rocks for trying to embarrass me. What an experience. The end. Well, it's time for spanish class. I put on for my city.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Chou Large

It's raining. Bear with me because I am bored and in another long psychology class with people trying to be deep. Anyways, I found a shirt last week that I'm coveting. Don't steal my idea:


It's classy, yet says, "I'm ready to party". Anyways, I ran into someone who was trying to throw up gang signs after a party. This is all good and well, but this person was throwing up some Ohio gang and I was very confused. First of all, where was the rest of his gang? Were they hiding in the bushes? Were they back at the gang headquarters? It's safe to say that they were probably back in Ohio. This was the first stupid thing. Who throws up their set with no backup nearby? The next thought that came to my head was that we're at Howard University. This guy wasn't poor and wasn't interested enough in sports or music to come here on a sports or music scholarship. He was just a regular guy. Follow my logic. This means he had to get to school the regular way-studying hard and getting A's on everything. He had no time to be banging for his crew. So, I want to make a statement, It's impossible to be a thug in college!!!!! People who are thugs for real would never represent out of state. Plus, most people in college are geeks. You can't step on to campus and suddenly be hard. It's impossible. Of course there are those people who live near campus so they get a thug pass but people coming from completely different states trying to thug are absolute idiots. Point blank period.

O.k. I'm about to leave class. What did happen to that boy?

Stay Out My Business

Good morning. I have a bone to pick right before I go to class. First of all, Plies' song "Plenty Money" is pretty catchy, but I am thoroughly perplexed because why is the song about having lots of money, yet the people with the least amount of money sing it? Huh? What? Yes. I decided that if you don't have money like that, which most people don't, please refrain from singing that song with such gusto. Maybe in the privacy of your home. But, everywhere else, i.e. the club, school, work, and any public place, please stop. Because at the end of the day, you don't have plenty money, you have mini money.

And another thing, why is everyone on the east coast a fan of Gucci Mane?! I'm fine if you enjoy his music. But people treat him like he is the next greatest thing. I can't hate because I'm not a rapper. He has some little measure of talent. However, compared to the greats, he has none. Sorry Gucci. Maybe next time. Every club in D.C. loves this man and stay blasting his music every other song, literally. How silly. I mean look at him:


Oh and before I go, my roommate hooked it up with the song of the day. T. Pain's "Every Girl remix" is great.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Don't You Ever Get Too Comfortable

Guess what world? My new G Shock came in the mail today!!


Anyways, how was everyone's Labor Day weekend? Oh, really? Well guess what, I don't even care. Joke's on you clown. So, I was sitting in the cafeteria today and this big girl walked by. Let me preface my story by saying that I have nothing against big girls and they are actually beautiful. However, this one was not. She was wearing the tightest shirt and her belly was hanging out. How atrocious. It got me thinking, what if I wear, do, or say certain things and I think I'm all that, but everyone is just laughing at me behind my back? That would be pretty sad.

Have you ever thought your luck was coming up only to have one part crash down? Yikes. I'm not going to front. I am very sad. See how I put it so simple, almost child-like? That was cool. Ok world, I need to stop getting sentimental right now. It is not a good look. The all points bulletin is still out. Lil' Jon, please return. I need to get hype.